Dealing with Delays

Has anyone ever noticed how we are surrounded by media that promotes us making our dreams come true? I keep hearing the theme song for the new(er) Pokémon, series ‘Journey starts today…’ playing around in my head.

Hmm, actually maybe it’s not all media, just what my son consumes…

Anyway, when we’re working towards a goal, or a dream for us romantics, it can quickly become all consuming. To the point where we can begin to feel guilty and like failures when we aren’t able to dedicate as much time as usual to achieving that goal. This is kind of where I am at the moment; I’ve mentioned regularly about my new job and the training, blah, blah, blah… and though I’ve had a few moments of inspiration and managed to release one story this year, I find myself getting anxious because I fear my dream is sliding through my fingers like sand.

I can’t get off the train I’m on, it’s the source of my financial stability. As the crippling cost of living rises, I’m not afforded the luxury of turning down opportunities to make more money. However, I feel frustrated because I genuinely (perhaps delusion-ally) believe my books will make a living income if I can just get enough of them out. But the time I need to dedicate to get them there would leave me with a huge gap of time where I got no muneh. I’d love to be a fly on the wall for the child services conversation where my son explains, ‘It’s okay, Mummy is going to start buying food again as soon as she’s famous for writing her sex books.’

But here’s what I’ve started to realise; slowing down does not mean stopping. Yes, my traction is slower, but this is only for a year. I can’t allow my frustration to develop into defeat, I’m not done.

Delays are inevitable, but if we allow ourselves as writers or dreamers to give up when life slows us down, the only guarantee we have is that we really won’t make it. We have to try not to get to caught up in the moment and remember that this is all part of the journey. (Which, according to Ash and his pals, starts today-ay.) There will be good years and bad years, and they’ll all make compelling stories for when I’m so highly regarded I’ll be asked to do a Ted Talk on what it takes to be smut writer. Watch this space.

Myley Cyrus famously sang, ‘Ain’t about how fast I get there, ain’t about what’s waiting on the other side. It’s the climb.’

I don’t know how appropriate it is for me to make a ‘it’s the cli-MAX’ joke here, but I’ll leave it with you all to play with at your leisure…

Take care,

Strange

In The Defence of Winter

Disclaimer: this post is neither funny nor about writing. It’s actually just my thoughts on a subject. Just a heads up. 🙂

I make no secret of the fact that I am an Autumn/Winter girl at heart. But if I’m completely honest, Autumn is my favourite of the two seasons. I’m something of a spiritual person and nature is definitely my church. To me, Autumn is the time when the world is growing quieter, yet magic and mystery are more alive than ever, blazing like fire in darkening evenings. Waiting in the shadows like playful spooks. It’s fun and exciting.

Then the winter comes along. It gently sprinkles its own subtle magic over everything it touches. You can see the world glittering, turning as delicate as glass at the fluttering brush of Winter’s cold fingertips. It smiles soothingly, chuckling at the irony of the misconceptions that surround it. Winter does not bring death, just much needed sleep.

Society today gets quickly swept up in the excitement of seasonal celebrations, so we enjoy the winter for those reasons. We embrace warm jumpers, fluffy blankets, hot chocolates, large dinners, gift giving etc. But it is all over too quickly, and before long, it is January.

And then the wait begins. We sit and pine for the sun, eager for Spring to hurry and save us from the seemingly endless wasteland of winter.

I get it, sometimes I feel the same way. But I try to remind myself to be grateful for these slower months. To take time to just be inside with the ones I love, without the need for a tree laden with pretty boxes. Still cuddle up and stay warm together, talk to each other, listen to each other.

Yes, winter is quiet, slow and cold. But it is also so beautiful just as it is. It forces us to accept what is utterly beyond our control, and therefore to be grateful for what we have. Try not to wish it away, but instead, embrace it, revel in the gift of these moments of peace.

Take care,

Strange

My view of a stunning Winter sunrise from the train to work

And we’re ready write…

More of a post than a blog post a suppose, I just felt like sharing this incredibly important part of my writing process. You know, in case it helps any of you other writers out there.

1) Make a hot chocolate.

2) Don’t skimp on the whipped cream and sprinkles.

3) Write the next Jurassic Park with your new found, hot chocolate fuelled inspiration.

You’re welcome 😎

Take care,

Strange

I guess I’m selling… in?

Hey Strangers!

So, remember a little while back, I said I was considering expanding my horizons somewhat? Well, I’ve decided to take the plunge: I’m writing a full on, in-one-piece, romantic-rather-than-erotic novel!

And, to top it off, I’m actually going to try to submit it to a publisher and see if I can get it published traditionally.

I should note that I have a few pros and cons for this decision. The pros are mostly that it’s going to serve as a milestone for my writing: it’s mainstream, full length and I may actually get critiqued (rejected) by someone in ‘the biz.’

There’s also the obvious pro that in some wonderful universe where I need to buy a lotto ticket, I might actually get published! Live the dream: book release…public appearances…a movie? Dinner with RuPaul? The sky’s the limit.

Now for the cons. The genre of the book is paranormal/ adventure/romance so I still get to be a bit flirty and dirty in my writing, but it’s much more vanilla than the Strange brand usually presents. Not that I mind that, it’s just going to be a learning curve for me. I mean, I find whips and chains super romantic, but where’s the line for the rest of the world?

Also, it means a lot of my energy is being put into one place. I’ll still be writing my shorts on the side, but they won’t be as regular and that worries me because I don’t want to lose the 5mph traction I’ve built over the last year and half.

The scariest thing for me though, is I won’t be writing under my pen name, I’ll be writing under my real name. Because this isn’t erotica, I don’t have to hide my identity. Which is great for the most part, I can actually stand up and take credit for my work. But I’m actually a little sad to shrug off K M Strange. I feel like I’ve grown so much with her, the writing style, the colours, even the colour scheme. It’s all very me. I know I can apply the same style to my real name, but I still can’t risk being connected.

Of course, if I hit the big time I can quit my day job and come out of the stationary cupboard once and for all. Then there will be no shutting me up! Muhahaha!

Anyone out there had any experience in traditional publishing, I’d be very grateful for your tips, tricks or even just your stories.

(Sorry, not your stories; I’m not trying to steal your work. I meant your experiences. I swear…)

Saul Bellow said, “You never have to change anything you got up in the middle of the night to write.”

If someone wakes me in the middle of the night to write they’ll have to redo it completely because I’ll have made them eat it. I’m a Mum.

Take care!

Strange

A Note on Sexy Storytelling

Good morning world!

Strange here. Just had a little inspiration for some thoughts I’d like to share. I don’t often give advice on any platform where I can avoid it. This is for two reasons;

1) What the hell do I know? On a scale of the whole world who access the internet, I am certainly no scholar on any topic. Who am I to tell someone what to do?

2) Who needs the aggro? Most topics these days are considered highly controversial by someone. And I rarely care enough about any given topic to fight a passionate stranger over the web about it. Everyone’s entitled to their opinions, of course, so I tend to just keep mine to myself.

However, I heard something today that made me chuckle, and also made me want to sit someone down for a quick ‘girls-chat.’ But since I don’t know her, I figured I’d just put this out into the world to see if it helps anyone.

So, a friend of mine received a voice message from friend with benefits, (for the sake of the post, we’ll call her Elle) detailing her saucy exploits at a BDSM club the night before. Let me tell you, the stuff she saw and did was hawt! I actually found myself becoming somewhat excited by content of what she was describing.

My friend on the other hand, was a little grossed out. Not because she doesn’t like what was being described, quite the contrary, but something about the recording just set her teeth on edge.

Now, being an erotic writer doesn’t give me claim to many occupational skills, but sexy story telling is definitely one of them. As I considered our different reactions, I started to realise what Elle had done wrong.

You see, Elle had sent this recording to my friend with the intention of getting her excited with her outrageous adventures, but she wanted to seem subtle and cool, as if my friends approval was a bonus but not necessary.

I get that, when you’re flirting with someone, you want them to be interested in you without seeming too bothered by it. The problem was, Elle tried to achieve this by telling the story as if she were doing stand up. For example, ‘So, I was at the club and I look over and Georgia is getting fingered by the barman! Hahaha. I don’t know if the bar will pass their next health inspection after that!’

…You see what I mean?

Now, anyone who has read my work will know I love lacing a little comedy into my stories, but you can’t have a punchline to a sexy scene. All it does is make the whole thing feel awkward and uncomfortable. If someone is cracking jokes at a time like that, it’s usually a good sign that they’re not hot for you. Sorry about it.

So, what I would like to say to Elle is this; if you’re telling a sexy story, then tell the sexy story. Commit to it, go all in. Let your voice become a little husky while you remember the way the barmans shoulders bulged while he thrust his fingers in and out of your friends wet pussy. Tell us how her moans of pleasure made you want to place your lips on hers and taste her gasps, to adsorb some of her ecstasy into you.

The sexiest thing in the world in confidence. If she had told that whole story with honest arousal in her voice, she’d have been getting an invite to dinner and drinks with Mr Strange and I. As it is, I don’t think Elle will be hearing from my friend anytime soon.

So there you have it folks, a few words of wisdom from a humble erotic writer.

As a side note, I’ve just finished the first draft of Beast of Backar 2, (Title still pending), I’m really excited about this ending, I’ve definitely gotten a little wrapped up in the drama of it all, but I think it worked. I’ve loved writing this story, and I’m sometimes surprised by the pleasure I still experience from writing. Every time I think, ‘God that was so fun, I’ll never love writing a story like a did that one!’ I fall in love all over again. It’s a wonderful feeling.

Also, I think I’ve accidentally invented a writing genre. A lot of the ideas I’ve been coming up with seem to include some kind of a murder or crime with the protagonists having to solve it. Is erotic-crime a thing? If not, patent-pending! 😆

Oh, one final thing. I think only the most expert of erotic storytellers can use the word ‘squirt’ and make it sexy. Note, you’ll never see it in any of my stories because I can’t pull it off. Elle used it at least four times. 🙄

We’re Going Through Changes…

Truth be told, I do not love that song. If I had to choose though, like gun to my head, I’d probably listen to the Osbourne’s version over the original. Don’t judge me!

Quick disclaimer; this post is not really about writing, more an update/life musings post. If you’re not in the mood for that, feel free to close this and read a more relevant post. It’s cool, I feel ya.

Thank God you’re still here. I mean, I was playing it cool but honestly my self-esteem is entirely hinged on your continued interest in this post.

Aaaaanyway…lately I’ve had a lot of stuff go down. Real stuff. I mentioned a while ago that I lost a relative recently, I don’t want to go into details, but it was someone who I really feel like I needed more time with. I’ve been working through the ole’ grieving process with my usual grace and resilience (cut to me sobbing under bed while muffling my cries with cinnamon buns) but I’m learning a lot about myself as I go.

The biggest impact it’s had is that I’ve had to seriously reassess my self-image and understanding where I fit in this crazy world. As a result, I’ve been hella insecure lately. Which has made me massive amounts of fun to be around.

So far though, as I build this new chapter/version of myself I’ve found a few things: 1) I want to be a writer more than anything (career wise) and I’ve thrown myself into it as a result. My short story collection for Halloween is coming along at breakneck speed. 2) Being a mum was always at my core, but now I really understand the gravitas of the relationship for the child. There is no other job that could possibly compare. 3) I’m funny even when I’m sad. Ironic win.

So, there you have it. I’m slowly emerging as a new version of myself and I’m excited to see how it progresses. If any of you can relate, I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Faraaz Kazi said, ‘No matter how bad your heart is broken, the world does not stop for your grief.’

Well, fuck you too Kazi. 😒

Take care,

Strange

The Beast of Backar

Hello, readers!

How are we all keeping? I hope everyone is enjoying the burgeoning Spring as much as I am. Though I’m an Autumn girl at heart, I do enjoy seeing nature start to wake from her slumber as birds are singing and flowers are blooming once again.

…That was all a little poetic for me. Hey-ho, you gotta write what you feel I guess…

Aaaaaaanyway, the really reason I’m writing is to express my excitement about finally finishing my latest short story: The Beast of Backar.

This, like so many of my stories, has started off based on one idea, and changed and evolved more times than I could track as I was writing it. The initial focus was on the immense size of the male-protagonist.

His height people. Come on, minds out of the gutter.

This theme is still prevalent throughout, (with sexy results) but the characters ended up having so many other defining qualities, the story became so different from how I’d planned it.

What you can expect though, is a sparky female lead, an unbelievably hot man and lots of heated tension. (With sexy results!)

It’s the first of three parts but, like my other works, still stands alone as its own erotic story.

I should mention that there are also some twists and turns and an element of mystery and danger. I’m starting to lean into this kind of writing a little. I don’t know why, to be honest, erotica has always been my thing. But I just can’t seem to stop myself at your standard ‘wham-bam-thank-you-mam,’ stories. And I’ve genuinely loved writing this. I can’t wait to see how it progresses!

Anyway, if you’re looking for an erotica story with all these elements, you may find the Beast of Backar is right up your alley. And maybe some other places…

To finish, I’ll leave you with this: Charles Baudelaire said, ‘My heart is lost, the beasts have eaten it.’

Sure Charles, we get ya. The beasts ate my heart too…

You can download The Beast of Backar here

The Thing About Weirdos…

Have you ever felt like you didn’t really belong? Like when you look around, it’s like watching Planet of the Apes- sure everyone looks vaguely like you, and the world looks familiar, but you still don’t quite fit? Also Helena Bonham Carter is there without Jonny Depp? It’s all just a little off.

When I was a teenager, this feeling made me very self-conscious. I tried to keep myself to myself and when I got physically and verbally attacked by other teens, I just took it because I felt like I deserved it. I was an outsider in their world after all.

Yep, like pretty much all creative people, I had a hard time as teen. Boohoo. You know what though? The thing about weird people is…they grow up to be freaking awesome.

I’m not just talking about me here, though I do think I’m pretty awesome. And hot. And humble. But it’s actually the case of almost all weird people I’ve met or know of. The fact is, weird youngsters get a hard time because most people their age don’t see the oddness for what it is- Intelligence/creativity/humour.

Believe it or not, I didn’t even see this truth clearly until I was re-watching (for the billionth time) a series of RuPauls Drag Race and the Queens were talking about how they were ostracised as teens, and now they’re revered for their art.

I’m in my 30s and I’m only just now starting to put myself out there a little more with my writing and my humour etc, and the funny thing is, it’s not just hearing that other people like what I’m doing that’s so empowering, it’s how I feel about what I’m doing.

My point is, if you, like me, ever feel or felt like you’re not normal- it’s because you’re not, and that’s a really, really good thing. The world might not get you yet, but they will. And when that day comes, make sure you’re ready to show exactly what you’re made of!

She Did the Monster Mash!

I know, I know; another very old reference. I mean, I think that song came out in the sixties, waaaaay before my time. But I have very positive connotations with that song. As a child, I remember seeing the video on TV and it was the first time I remember seeing adults doing something silly without actually pitching it towards kids. I realised then that October 31st was a time when adults and kids alike could play dress up and have a good laugh together. That was when I fell in love with Halloween.

It was with this in mind that I lovingly named my latest story after that song, albeit changing the pronoun a little. She Did the Monster Mash is my latest release on Amazon and features the various exploits of one woman as she traverses the ‘horrors’ of Halloween. This is largely based on my own impression of the ancient celebration- many cultures agree that this is the time when they veil between worlds is at its thinnest, connecting us with the creatures from beyond. Anything is possible. As a teenager, I spent many an October night wandering around my hometown, observing the festivities and inviting the mysterious to come and say ‘hello.’ I was an arty kid, okay? I didn’t get invited to many parties.

This story depicts the sort of stuff I suppose I was hoping to come across on some level, and it was a great experience getting to live out my own haunting fantasies through my writing. And a fang-tastic time was had by all! Oh yeah. I went there. HALLOWEEN!

So, if you get time between pumpkin carving, apple bobbing, and skimpy costume wearing, give my chilling tale a try. *Skimpy costume not mandatory but highly encouraged.*

Happy Haunting!

She did the Monster Mash is available here!